19 December 2014

After a while, you don't ask "what's wrong?" anymore,
You just stop asking altogether.

07 December 2014

Am I racist?

     Before the fall of Suharto, the constitution of Indonesia is such that Indonesians are only allowed "Indonesian names" regardless of ethnic groups. This is arguably to foster nationalism, unity and reduce racism. But to what extend is this method really successful and applicable to a multiracial country? If the same law was to be implemented in Malaysia, will people be against it or with it? I once had a conversation with two juniors. Both are children from mixed marriages and they believe that people shouldn't be labelled according to their "races" and that if races were to continue, what "race" are they? The point they tried to get across to me was that they are against racism. When we spoke of the condition in Indonesia i.e. the implementation of Indonesian names, they were very passionate about it and said that it was the best way since no one is categorized. I tried to reason with them whether that is truly the best way. My argument was that we all have our distinctive and unique culture and by forcing people to use a certain kind of name alone would not reduce racism. Whose names are we supposed to follow? The Malays? The Chinese? The Indians? Or the natives?

     I am not saying that what Indonesia is doing is wrong but that there are always two sides to a coin. Yes, it may foster nationalism. But what about the culture of the people that is being jeopardized? I definitely would not want anyone or any group to force me to do something that I don't want to. Like the Hudud Law, but that is another thing altogether. I wasn't trying to force them to agree to my opinion, I was just trying to make them look at other aspects. My juniors either could not understand my argument or they refused to listen as they kept supporting the Indonesian way (in a very scary and obsessive manner). I think they were trying to label me a racist indirectly because they kept saying things like "I'm so glad I found a likeminded person", "happy to know someone is against racism", "I'm very passionate bla bla bla" to each other. I gave up after a while because they refused to listen to my logic. So, I said in my mind, "ahhh, fuck off" and kept quiet.

 P/S: I might not have "listened" to their arguments either. Who knows.
 P/P/S: Please correct me if I'm wrong.

24 October 2014

This whole waiting thing, it's shit isn't it?

21 September 2014

Siem Reap


Apparently the prettiest temple, but all I could see was tourists. #notimpressed

10 July 2014

Late Night Rantings.

Looking through old photographs. I used to look at it all the time. A bit of a psycho if you ask me.

1. My dad brings his camera everywhere. He loves loves taking pictures. He would be the modern day guy-forever-with-his-dslr.

2. Tybalt makes a lot of funny faces when photographed. I even laughed when I saw some (I hardly laugh at anything besides humans).

3. I'm not sure if I'm an unhappy kid. I see myself sulking in most of my pictures. I didn't even change much. Except my face grew bigger so my eyes looked way smaller. And I WAS snow white, now I'm just hot black.

4. I had shit haircuts. Either that, or no hair. Bald since forever. Probably explains why I look like a boy those days.

5. My sleeping position didn't change. Used to sleep on my belly, still do.

6. As a child, I used to have pretty crazy tan lines. My body was quite muscular too (probably cause skinny). Hahah, self-praise.

7. My brothers and I, all 3 of us used to have the same nose. Not literally of course. Not sure now.

8. One of the photo reminded me of an incident. My dad hanged his phone on my neck. Then we went to eat and I placed the phone on the table and my grandma accidentally spilled water on the phone and it went crazy for a while and I felt damn damn guilty and kept saying sorry to my dad. He didn't blame me in the first place but still.

P/S: Mom used to shout at me around 1 am asking me to sleep. But since I only sleep after 5.30 or 6. am, now she just tells me to sleep latest by 3 am. I must be a horrible child.

05 July 2014

i just want to disappear hahahah

21 June 2014

Meet my Korean friend.


This is Lee SeoHee, the prettiest, bravest and richest (lolol) among the lot of us. She went back to Korea yesterday after a year of exchange programme. When we sent her off, against her will (we sneaked up on her) she said "I don't want to cry" "No, no, no crying. We just want to send you off." Seeing her waving from a distance, we almost cried but didn't la, tahan macho. 
I guess no more using Korean words until we find another Korean friend hahah. Being in Malaysia for only a year, she traveled to more places here than we all did. 

She's the girl who buys lots of snacks and distributes it to everyone. Buy lots of food, doesn't finish it and gives it to everyone. The one who gets lots of attention. The one lecturers always look at and mention. Trollolol she hates it. 

I think many expected her to be into Kpop and all that but she's the total opposite. She watches ang moh shows only :P I wish we spent more time with her when she was around but that will now only be wishful thinking. 

I will miss you pabo, mongchun. Albeit a short encounter, I hope you had the time of your life. You certainly gave us great memories, being our cool Korean friend. 

05 June 2014

Captain emo.


That one night, when the world is awfully lonely. 

02 June 2014

Past the point of no return.

Like a crazy woman, except, I'm totally crazy.
Dazed, totally dazed.
Are you satisfied with your actions?
Disappointed, totally disappointed.
I want to fly.
My dreams are small.
How do you measure dreams anyway?
Steered, almost lost, but not.
I'm crazy, I truly am.
IPOD IPOD IPOD IPOD IPOD

Nothing. I just miss my iPod really really much.